Goodbye, Big Orange I

When I was a kid, I engaged in all sorts of dialogue with inanimate objects. They came to life in my busy, only-child mind. I talked to Angel, our Christmas tree topper. I greeted the Abraham Lincoln bust atop our console TV each day with a "Good Morning, Abe." And, when we moved to Pocatello, Mom introduced me to the Big Orange "I." In the days before she enrolled me in ISU's Early Learning Center, she took me to Red Hill and told me the "I" was there to watch over me. Kids are never to young to learn about puns.

Angel is barely held together with a creative kluge of hot glue, nails and a rubber band, and Abe's head fell off in the 90's when he took a tumble off the TV during a wind storm. Mom glued his head back on and tied a Christmas bow around his neck to hide the scar. Abe spent a few years in storage, but I brought him back to the living room a couple years ago. He's such a rich, fanciful and fragile part of my history. So, has been the Big Orange "I"

I've known for years that the "I's" days are numbered. Just like Angel's, Abe's and mine. Angel and Abe won't make it much longer than I do because time is treating them like it treats everything. They are also my traditions and won't be appreciated by next generations. That makes me a little sad, but I don't always need to fix sadness. A lot of times sadness is unavoidable and can only be waded through.

I tracked down some former ISU engineering students whose senior design project over a decade ago assessed the "I". Their conclusion unsurprisingly stated that it was unsafe and would eventually need to be removed. Even my untrained eye could arrive at that conclusion without intense analysis and mind-numbing formulas, but I was curious about their assessment of a replacement.

They explained that the "I" was contributing to erosion as the concrete diverted water and prohibited vegetation that could thwart further erosion around and below it. The surrounding hillside would experience the same erosion over time with another concrete slab. The slope of Red Hill with no vegetation would just result in the same problems with the same risks. Darn.

What about a large-scale design modeled after the Price is Right game Plinko? Rock climbing holds could be scattered all over the face which would be perfect for diverting water and double as an excellent outdoor climbing wall. Put me on a committee, ISU, and I can come up with many more insurance nightmares enshrined in school spirit.

I try not to be one who complains about a problem without bringing a solution to the table, but I don't know that there is a solution as visible and bold as the "I."  So, I guess I'm not complaining here. I'm just wading through my own sadness in saying "goodbye" to the Big Orange "I". Thank you for watching over me all these years.