I was delighted to see the July 26 font page of the ISJ. The
headline just below the fold read, “Moms work to reach sixth-grade girls.“ I had a feeling this story would be coming,
and I knew it would be good. As I read along I kept thinking, “I know
them! I know them!”
I first met Courtney Fisher and Rainbow Maldonado when we
were sophomores at Poky. We played junior varsity basketball together, and by “played”,
I mean we sat the bench and cheered. Although, I got to go in sometimes to set a
screen because I was one of the big girls, but for the most part, we didn’t see
much playing time. Apart from basketball, we ran in different, albeit friendly
circles and didn’t get to know each other until 20 years later while planning
our high school reunion.
I was in charge of the July event and a few months before, I
suffered a head injury when I boarded a bus to take my middle school math club
to Boise. I played rugby for nine years without incident, but one fateful day with
the mathletes and I incur 11 nights in the hospital, miss nine and a half weeks
of work and accrue $50,000 in hospital bills. Thank God for insurance. And
thank God for Rainbow and Courtney.
On Facebook, they could see from my status updates and
hospital gown pictures that I wasn’t making any progress on our reunion. Courtney messaged me offering to take over
the main dinner planning. Not only did she want to help, but she also had ideas
to make our dinner better and with Rainbow’s assistance, they did just that.
That’s one of the things I love about these women. They are geared up to
contribute. They aren’t passengers in the boat, but rather crewmates wielding a
paddle with a passion and fueled for forward motion.
I don’t see Courtney and Rainbow as often as they see each
other, but we keep in touch and meet for an occasional lunch or cup of coffee. During
one such get-together with Rainbow last winter, we realized our mutual feelings
of “kids these days need more from us” and “what can we do?” That’s when she told me about the Finding Kind documentary and
accompanying Kind Campaign program aimed at middle school girls. A family in town had just lost a daughter to
suicide and another had lost one the year before. Do you see this Pocatello?
Chubbuck? Southeast Idaho? Our community has lost two girls under the age of 16
in the last 18 months to suicide. TWO.
So when people wonder why this program is so specific and
why these moms pursued it, I imagine that’s partly why. In addition to watching their own daughters
navigate pre-teen challenges and social circles, they’ve seen what’s happened
in our community. Data and experience suggest that this demographic could use
extra guidance in dealing with exactly what the Finding Kind documentary and accompanying Kind Campaign curriculum addresses:
“physical fighting, name-calling, threats, power struggles, competition,
manipulation, secrets, rumors, and ostracizing other girls.” How do we stop these behaviors and how to we
help girls cope with them when they occur?
As Courtney and Rainbow approached the Mayor’s office and
the school district for support and collaboration with the Kind Campaign, they
learned of other initiatives in the community also centered around kindness and
how we treat each other. A few stakeholders convened and Kind Community was
born.
Becoming a part of the Kind Community collaborative isn’t a
pledge toward perfection. It’s a commitment to celebrate each of our diverse
efforts to uphold and bolster a shared vision for creating and ensuring just
that—a Kind Community. We—that’s right—we seek to promote and connect one
another working toward similar goals. I’m thrilled to be a part of this
collective even though I also feel a great vulnerability every time I publicly
advocate kindness.
What my pup decides to chew in the morning, new shoe or dog
bone, may affect my capacity for kindness on any given day. I succumb all the
time to the humanistic dangers of ego, pride, and a personal investment in
being right. It’s important for engineers to get things right, and I forget (or
ignore) that sometimes there is no right when feelings are involved. Like any
campaign there will be missteps and interpersonal struggles, but believe me. The
heart and soul behind Kind Community love southeast Idaho and want to
proactively engage groups and individuals to share resources
and leverage relationships for the greater good.
Is a Kind Community important to you? If so, please consider
becoming one of the many partners in kind. For more information, email kindcommunity2015@gmail.com or like
Kind Community on Facebook.
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