Honey or Venom

High School Graduation Day is almost here. For some, the day looms while for others, it beckons. Just yesterday, these graduates were babies, but any day now they can join the military, embark upon missions, move away for college, or continue to hole up in the basement playing video games. What will inspire these graduates?

I can still recall the inspiring speech at my sixth grade graduation 29 years ago.  I could fill volumes with reflections stemming from my atheist mother’s decision to send me to a religious elementary school, and that sermon alone would command a few chapters.

I don’t know if it this is really true, but it made for a great story that made its mark on my heart. At my graduation the pastor spoke of a chemical in a flower that a breed of spider used to make its venom. He noted that a certain bee used this same chemical to make honey.  He contrasted the sweet and pleasing aspects of honey with the dangerous and dastardly effects of venom

In his rich, German accent, he spoke of two brothers who grew up with an alcoholic and abusive father. One brother also became an alcoholic and was homeless; the other a sober, successful businessman and doting father. When asked individually what led them to their respective lives they each replied,

“My father was a mean alcoholic, what would you expect?”

From the same thing, one learned what to become and one learned what not to become.

Since that graduation day, visions of honeycombs and bees and spiders and webs flash through my mind when I feel myself react and have split seconds to guide my thoughts, words, or actions.

Graduation is a gateway to new experiences and independence.  We have situations, traits, or family members we haven’t chosen, but like a blossoming flower, a world of choices opens with that diploma in hand. Attitudes, pens, tongues, and behaviors can all be channeled with honey or venom. My mom was kind, funny, and perpetually optimistic. Her world view aligned perfectly with that graduation address and its themes of positivity, choice, and taking control of my own happiness.

Graduation is an ideal time to consider life choices, happiness, and next paths. Will they be paths flowing with honey or paths wrought with venom? Either way, the choice is ours and we get to make it over and over, not just on graduation day.